DEAR SIR OR MADAM:

"i am sure you have over looked through several resumes with the same
     information about work experience, education, and references. i am not going to
     give you that stuff "

      i would love to interview for the position of (insert job title here),if you
     grant me an interview for (insert job title here) i feel confident youll see why
     im the right person for the job" "my mother delivered me without anaesthesia 

     so i have an IQ of 146 and can therefore learn anything"
   
     "i enjoy working closely with customers, and my pleasant demeanour  helps
      them feel comfortable and relaxed -not afraid" i realise that my total lack of
      appropriate experience may concern those considering me of for employment"
      but "i have integrity, so i will not steal office supplies and take them home"


      pls dont regard my 14 position as job-hopping, i never once quit a job
      "they stop paying me" in my next life, i will be a professional backup dancer or
      a rabbi" but for now, " i am attacking my resume for you to review" i realise
      that my resume is no longer exemplary thanks to my family destroying the
      computer file" nevertheless, here are my qualification for you to overlook"

       "thank you for your consideration hope to hear for you shorty!"


      SINCERLY,

       HOPELESS JOB SEEKER